Monday, April 20, 2015

l told the bended truth.










A few weeks ago, I got assigned to a sub group in school where we were meant to design a business plan for a community pharmacy and defend before our lecturers who were posing as venture capitalist. Unfortunately, I was the only female in the group ( dunno how that happened).

The group leader decided we meet everyday at 4:00 for 2hours, but we always show up 30 minutes late except l and Alex (not real name) and of course we have a lil chit chat for 30 minutes everyday.

So the two of us have a chat. It started out innocuously enough, you know, Hi, you are early again?

Yes!

How did your day look like?

Busy, busy, busy!

Until about a week later when he clearly thought wed crossed into comfortable territory and threw me a curly one: So do you have a boyfriend?” Now heres where things went a bit pear shaped.

I lied.

Yes(pause). I do. Have a boyfriend.(With a slur)

Really? How long have you been together?

Uhmm..., not long. Early days…”

So you havent met the parents yet then?!

(Scoffs)Well, er, Ive only met his mum. Shes really nice. Although shorter than I expected…” (Um What?! How tall is an imaginary mother meant to be?!)

Anyway, as I headed back to the hostel, I tried to figure out why Id just lied because I might be
many things, but a liar I am not. At first I thought it was because I was cranky and tired and I simply forgot that Im single. But its not like skipping breakfast you dont just forget. No, if Im being really, scarily honest, I lied because I was embarrassed about being single.

Yep, I thought if I told the truth, my friend would look at me like I was the last banana left on the shelf. The one that no one wants to buy because everyone else has avoided it so you assume theres something wrong with it.

I wanted him to think that someone, somewhere thought I was pretty darn special as though I couldnt be pretty darn special flying solo! How wrong is that? Wronger than Miley Cyrus touching herself onstage thats how wrong. And 99% of the time I know this, its just that 1% of the time irrational thoughts take over my brain and I go a bit crazy.

I forget that choosing to be single or being single because you havent found the right lover yet doesnt mean youre unloved, unwanted and unattractive. It means youre strong enough to
wait for something thats truly toe- curling, heart-burstingly ALL OF THE FEELINGS great.

It means youve got the confidence to hold out for that someone who knows youre worthy of taking off the shelf. So the next time I find myself having a 1% moment and losing touch with reality, Im going to go and play Volleyball or something. You know, give myself an actual reason to be embarrassed.

And in the meantime, how do you think I should let my imaginary boyfriend know its over between us? I dont want to hurt his feelings

Do you ever have these 1% moments too? Id love to hear from you. Leave a comment or tweet me



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9 comments:

  1. Hehehehehhehehe...I really do love your blog

    ReplyDelete
  2. **In the words of www.sophsinspiration.blogspot.com Awwwggh! You do know you are a very cute someboRRy shaaaaa dontcha?! Kai! A neFer hexspeRRed it! So this post is something I can really relate with! Wait!! Did you by any chance read my mind?! cause i wrote on the same subject MaRRa just this past Monday.. Well maybe you and I are just a case of 2 hearts far away beating as one! You know I feel like this all the time.. Not Like the "There is something wrong with me oh!" or "aYam the last banana on the shelf.." feeling oh... But like I am tired of being single.. But the truth is there is no Biggie... i mean we are young an hell! we will not live forever! So why stay and regret what you are when you can as well have madt fun with it?! My Prescription is simple... Kick of your shoes, Dance Like no one is watching and have fun Baby mi! Love dont catch a ghe staying Inside Solo and feeling unwanted, it usually catches those on the outside having fun and living their life... Live Baby mi.. And mbok dont claim to be hitched when you are not, you just might be pouring sand inside ya own garri :)

    Wait first! This picshur of both of us is strange! Look at it! I am single and maybe searching... You are Single and maybe searchable.. **Clears Throat... **in the words of the legendary Pinky and the Brain... Are you thinking what I am thinking Pinky?! hehehehehehehe Cheers Bubba, and dont sweat it.,. You are perfect by default... and the crowd goes.. Ooosssshheeey Turn uP!

    ReplyDelete
  3. This guy has also carried his ass kissing here...Bia John O Gini n'eme gi sef. park well biko. Remember me form

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lmao! Ass kissing?! Really?! Yeah I remember you.. You said the exact same words on one of my favorite blogs.. Dear Anonymous, if me being myself and living my life like is borrowed is considered ass kissing.. Then Let me "Ass kiss" with as much passion as I can muster.. Thank you for being so kind and considerate with your comments and for taking your time to notice confused me, you do me a great Honor with them.. You are truly the best... and i say this with a smile.. Ooosssshheeey Turn uP!

      Delete
  4. Well I tell people I had a relationship most times to ward off unwanted attention from some men but most times I just plain out and tell you I am single...the world doesn't end there.

    ReplyDelete

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